I have noticed through my years with chronic illness that when someone is a younger person with chronic illness society approaches them in a much different way than if it is an elderly person who is facing illness. Young people receive the message to “push, push, push”, and “fight, fight, fight”, while with our elderly population most people are more inclined to tell them to “take it easy” and “be sure to rest” and things of that nature.
For years, I internalized these societal messages, refusing to use mobility aids when I really needed them, refusing to quit driving when it had actually become unsafe for me to do so, and pushing myself to points of such misery I became severely depressed and made those in my life also miserable to be around me. It has been a long, long, painful journey of self-exploration, and deep inner work to find my footing to be fully accepting of my current state of health and what my abilities truly are and are not and living in a way that is kind and honoring to myself.
I hope if you are currently facing this struggle in your life you find your way to peace and acceptance more quickly and less painfully than I did, do not let other’s pressure you to try to still be everything that other’s ‘your-age’ are, and able to do, so that you appease their emotional needs. Do what is right for you, advocate for what you need, use those mobility aids when you need, don’t push to stay up late studying like other’s you age can/do, don’t feel the need to continue working full-time, or keeping up financially and physically with that big house, driving, doing yoga, or whatever it is, that you know your body is telling you that you can’t do any longer, but you are refusing to listen to.
Accepting what you are able to do in this moment is honor to yourself, it is not weakness, it is not surrender.
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